the beauty of moths and butterflies
i had this vision. during worship one monday morning, Jesus came and talked to me.
he took me back to the day of my attack. but not where i thought he’d go. this wasn’t a time for healing from being victimized, but something so much sweeter.
bekah. bekah was sitting across from me on the floor, in the middle of mom and pop’s living room. she looked down and hit play on her worship playlist. i had a moment of anger because i didn’t have my worship playlist any longer. but i laid my head on my knees, and started talking to Jesus. he was so sweet. bekah was worshipping, praying over the atmosphere.
why was this the moment i was back in? it was a good moment, i didn’t need to process this. but Poppa knew i did. today, on bekah’s birthday, i am so thankful he took me back.
the vision was still in the living room of mom and pop’s house, but now it was starting to change. the police, in real life, were supposed to show up now. instead, the Lord told me to stop watching what was going on, but to now be in the moment.
i was sitting on the floor again. no longer was i rewatching, but i was in the middle of the living room in south africa once again. Poppa told me to look up, so i did. in the place of bekah, were thousands of moths. they flew and soared, they were beautiful. as i looked i smiled, but then i got upset. i asked the Lord where bekah was in the midst of all the moths, i wanted to see her.
at that exact moment, all the moths split, and light from heaven came down. out of the middle of the moths, the most beautiful, giant butterfly rose, straight up into the light. i watched and watched, but i didn’t fully understand. i don’t know how to describe it as glorious as it was, but let me just tell you..it was breathtakingly beautiful.
today i discovered what it meant.
bekah, if you don’t already know, loved moths. they seek light, just like she wanted to. what bekah didn’t fully realize is that she was the light. she was light because Christ is light, and we are like him. all these moths were flying around to seek the light, but they were kind of aimless because the room was bright and with all the windows, there was no direct source for them to go to.
then, the butterfly arose. and as it did, heaven light came down to surround it, and take it up to eternal light. the butterfly knew that it belonged in the light, that it didn’t have to seek it because it already had light. it lived in the light here on earth, but the heaven light was sweeter and so that’s where it truly belonged.
when the butterfly went up, i was reminded that Poppa has my sister safe with Him. she is safe, i don’t have to worry. today, the Lord told me to look at all the moths left behind. He told me that when the butterfly went up, all the moths watched. they saw the butterfly not seek the light and get close to it, but instead know where the light was already and be engulfed in it. this is like bekah and the world, when bekah died, the world got to see Poppa take bekah to full glory. they got to see the love of the Father. they got to see what it looks like to find the light, and stay in it. they now know that the light is there, waiting for them. how beautiful.
i love the pictures the Lord gives me, and i love how he teaches me through them.
today is bekah’s 20th birthday, and she is having the best birthday yet. she lived her life ready for the moment she’d meet her Savior. how sweet is it that she gets to worship and dance with Him today.
i miss you so much.
